I was going in for one thing. I may have a problem. #groceryshopping
August 18th, 2019 Eighteen Years Later
Yesterday was a 4-star day: I maintained the integrity of my calorie budget, I remained refined sugar-free, I exceeded my daily water goal, and I stayed well connected with exceptional support.
After severe weather coverage late last night, after an exceptionally long day–it was a super-short night of rest. The alarm sounded at 5:50am. My early-morning broadcast from the Farmers Market required me to get up and be ready! Being ready for me means making sure I have enough time to properly complete my morning foundational routine and of course, time to get properly caffeinated!!
By the time the broadcast started, I was feeling sharp and on point despite getting to sleep about 2:30am. I was excited about the broadcast and excited because a long-time friend of mine and current member of my private support group was making the trip to Ponca City for a visit! Susan Astramskas is traveling her very own transformation road. In the last year, she’s released 111 pounds and counting. She’s given me permission to share her name and pictures in this post. You can follow her on Instagram every step of the way, too, at: @susan040864
Susan first came to know me for my stand-up comedy. I was just another comedian at another show her and her friends were enjoying. Something about my standup resonated with her and she made several shows during that period of my life. Who would have ever thought that eighteen years later, we’d be here?
|After a big New Years Eve Stand-Up Show-2001|
I’m so excited for Susan! She’s working her daily practice and generating a lot of enthusiasm for where she’s headed. It is an honor to witness and be a part of her incredible story and transformation! When she speaks of her “why” and the positive visualizations for her future, it’s difficult to not get emotional. Freedom, in so many ways…it’s powerful. She’s doing the work, each brand new day. Thank you, Susan!!
Usually, my morning starts with two cups water, then I start the coffee brewing, then I focus on my morning foundational routine. Today was different. Some heavy but not severe storms were moving through, so I did some “non-severe” on-air breaks first-thing. I’m sure I sounded like I’d just got out of bed…because, well, I’d just jumped out of bed! I was able to get that responsibility handled and “restart” my morning. I’m good now.
I plan on doing some much-needed apartment cleaning today, I have a call with the web designer for my new website (coming VERY soon), and I plan to get into the RecPlex this afternoon for a good workout before having dinner out this evening with mom. It’ll be a good Sunday!
“What about simply loving and accepting ourselves no matter our weight or size? I read a lot of fat-acceptance blogs and they make sense to me. Then I come here and I don’t know what to think. Some of your writing gets into my head.”–Kimber in Boston
Kimber, first, thank you for reading my blog and thank you for being the first person to ask a question via text to the DDWL and Transformation Planet Hotline! Great question! I recently started adding a small piece about this at the end of each blog posting. In response to your question, I’ll expand on it a little and put it up here for this edition.
“I’m just going to love and accept myself at 500 pounds.” –Me, circa early to mid-2000s. In hindsight, I see how I used that statement to release any and all personal responsibility for positive change. It was much easier that way. The gravitational pull toward the line of least resistance became justified in what seemed like a healthy perspective. It wasn’t a pure perspective and declaration. It was an out for me to continue my self-destructive food behaviors, but with slightly less guilt and self-loathing, protected by this “cape” of “acceptance.”
Look, I’m all about self-love and acceptance, it’s imperative, always…as long as it doesn’t become a convenient excuse/rationalization for inaction. I “loved” myself for years, and I embraced morbid obesity and the behaviors that kept me in a place of acceptance at 500 pounds—a place determined to eventually kill me.
One of the greatest expressions of self-love is exploring and accepting the power we hold, to choose change—once and for all, like never before. It isn’t a rejection of our current self, it’s self-love, self-care, and self-acceptance for where we are and what we’re doing. When we’re choosing change, it gives us an opportunity to practice self-love and self-acceptance for a variety of new, sometimes exciting, sometimes challenging and important things along this road. Believe me, underneath these clothes, the scars; the physical aftermath of living at 500 pounds for almost two decades provide me several important opportunities to practice self-love and self-acceptance.
I hope that helps clarify my position on this topic! Thank you, again, Kimber!
If you have a question, comment, personal epiphany, or anything else you’re willing to share, please do via comment, social media message, email, or simply text the DDWL/Transformation Planet Hotline: 580-491-2228.
My new website is coming this week! Yay!
Do you own an “I’m Choosing Change” wristband? This wristband can serve as a powerful awareness/mindfulness tool! It certainly does for me. I wear mine proudly, daily, and more and more people are joining me in this movement! Email me and let me know if you want one. I’ll send you a secure $15 PayPal invoice and personally ship it to you right away! email@example.com
Thank you for reading and your continued support,
Practice, peace, and calm,
If you’re interested in connecting via social media:
I accept friend requests on MyFitnessPal. My daily food logging diary is set to public.
MFP Username: SeanAAnderson
My Twitter: SeanAAnderson
Also–I’d love you to subscribe to my podcast Transformation Planet! You can find it in Apple Podcasts, in the Google Play store for Android, and listed wherever you find your favorite podcasts! If you haven’t listened before, you’ll find 20 episodes waiting for you!
Questions or comments? Send an email! firstname.lastname@example.org